“Please don’t leave me now . It is all an act . I am not as tough as I appear to be . I am broken . I want to cry and tell you everything . Please , understand my silence is not becuase I dont want to tell you everything . I just don’t know how to tell . You are my friend and I know my words have hurt you. You think I am angry with you but you should know I am angry with myself .
Please hold onto me a little while longer. I am sorry I am such a hard person to read. Please don’t listen to what I have said , you need to look through my act of toughness to see how vulnerable I am ! How much I need a friend right now !
I need you to understand I lied when I said “I am ok ” . Dont take my words for it . You are my friend , you should know when I am telling a lie .
I need a friend right now whom I don’t have to tell how I feel. A friend who knows how much I am hurting right now ? How much I need a shoulder to cry upon ? A friend who would just stand by me until I am able to stabilize my emotions.
Please dont tell me to be strong right now . I know that already , the more you tell me that the more guilty I would feel. Be patient with me for a little while longer. ”
If she could she would scream these words so that her leaving friend would listen .
But she has not said a word. She is looking at her friend with all these words in her eyes . A silent request hangs between them . She is waiting, waiting to be understood and accepted .