Trapped : That stage of life

We start our lives as dependents . Our parents and elders are responsible for us . We are allowed to make mistakes . Life is fun . We are free to do what we like. There are no burden , no responsibilities . We are not asked to make any life changing decisions .


Alas ! time changes. We grow old  , we are given responsibilities , we are held accountable for our actions , we start to race against time . We are to make decisions , big decision . We have to make choices than and there . Choices that we can’t undo . We face hardships , betrayal and rejections . We might feel devastated ,torn or broken .  But we have to be strong because we are at that stage , we have to fight our own battles . We are on our own .


With passage of time , we become more aware and learned . In the light of new information and understanding , we are horrified with the choices we made in past . We want to change them , we dream and pray for a second chance but time is not on our side anymore .

The clock in ticking . We can’t go in past , can’t change what we have or haven’t done . Missed opportunities , wrong decisions , unfulfilled promises , broken dreams are all real and experienced by us .


We want to forget , to change , to run , to hide but we can’t , can we ?

Nevertheless, It’s all part of life .We have to accept otherwise we will never be able move on .



Introverted Leaders: An Ignored Reality

In most of the literature on  leadership , “extraversion” is defined as an important quality of leadership . It makes the introverted students believe that they can NEVER be good leaders. We are taught about the importance of extroverted behavior and charismatic leadership .It  alienates the introverted students from the topic of leadership . As an introvert , I started to belief that I am not good enough for any leadership role . My personality is complete contradiction to that of a leader . I started to doubt myself .

But is it really the case ,can introverts not be good leaders ?

According to Susan Cain , the author of “Quiet:The Power Of Introverts In A World That Can’t Stop Talking “ ,

“Quiet Leadership is not an oxymoron “.


Ah ! Imagine my relief . I personally belief that topics like Quiet Leadership and “Introverted Leaders should also be highlighted and included in literature and courses on leadership .


World has seen great introverted leaders .Some of the  prominent introverted leaders are :

1. Abraham Lincoln

2. Rosa Parks

3.Eleanor Roosevelt


Source : ”  16 Outrageously Successful Introverts ”  , By Laura Schocker , The Huffington Post  and Susan Cain’s book “Quiet :The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking “

Information on these topics  will help us understand our nature and abilities better . At least , we will have examples we can understand and relate to .

While searching for more detail on this topic . I come across some great articles and blog  posts .

Suzi McAlpine , Executive Coach , replied to my question :

” I feel very strongly that good leadership does not depend on being introvert or extrovert “

In one of her blog post ” Quiet Leadership ” she wrote :

” If you are a quiet leader , don’t try to change who you are .At the same time, don’t allow your quiet demeanor to become a stumbling block to your success..”

– Suzi McAlpine (

Another great article was by Pearl J.Alexander , Sr. Director HR, Georgia Tech “ Leveraging Diversity of Temperament : An introverted Leader’s Story ” in which she said :

“As an introverted leader in a people-centric career, I am sometimes misunderstood. I am misunderstood because the introversion is viewed negatively, because I need time alone to reflect or create and because I don’t need a cast of thousands or to be the center of attention to feel powerful, in charge or comfortable with myself.”

I stumble across another great blog on leadership by Dan Rockwell , who is  a great coach , consultant and presenter .

 “One of my fatal leadership blunders was underestimating quiet people.” 

“Never assume quiet is weak and loud is strong.”

– He said in one of his blog posts ” 10 ways to Deal With Quiet People”.


More and more work is being done on this topic but still there is a great gap to fill . There is a great need to discuss these details with students in “Leadership” classes . So that instead of second guessing their abilities , introverted students can learn to accept their gifts and strive for greatness accordingly .

During my search , I have come across some books related to this topic :

1.“The Introverts Guide to Success in Business and Leadership”  –  Lisa Petrilli




2 . The Introverted Leader: Building on Your Quiet Strength   ,   Written by: Jennifer Kahnweiler


I will definitely take out some time to read these books .

I would like to thank Susan Cain , Suzi McAlpine, Pearl J.Alexander, Dan Rockwell and Laura Schocker for their wonderful work on “leadership” and” introversion” . Without their great work I would have never been able to write this post .

All the pictures are taken from Google images .



3Fs (Friend..Fake..Foe)

In life we meet different people. Some people become our closest friends others are just faking it for their personal gain and then there is a third category .

But what is the major difference among these three categories and which one is the most dangerous one ?

Friends: Friends are people who you can trust .They know you and accept you in their circle of trust . They care for you and are there to help you . Its a two way process. You must reciprocate their feeling and support .

Fake: This category is the most dangerous one . These people are pretenders . They pretend to care for you but they have some other motives .They want something from you and once they get what they want they leave you . You become invisible to them as if you do not exist anymore .

Foe : These people hate you . They may want to cause you harm but atleast they are honest about their feelings .

We must learn to identify our real friends and the fake ones . Untill and unless we learn to differentiate between these two we will make the mistake of spending too much time and energy on our fake friends .

What Price Opportunity?

The Old Money Book

I was speaking with a friend of a friend last week. His daughter had recently entered the workforce after obtaining a very good education. The job she’d taken wasn’t exactly what she wanted to be doing, but she was happy to have it. (He was happy she had it, too. Wink, nod.)

He had offered to give her an old family car to start out with. It was a 20 year old Volvo, cosmetically challenged, but reliable. (She hadn’t needed a car in college.) He had also suggested that she reach out to an college friend of his in her new city as a way of locating an apartment that might be a value.

Wanting to be independent and make her own decisions, she declined both offers. She purchased a new car–inexpensive and economical, to be sure, but one that still required a down payment and monthly payments–and signed a…

View original post 284 more words

Imperfection is the real perfection

We,human beings the most superior species on this earth, spend our lives searching for perfection. Looking for the perfect education , perfect job , perfect life partner , perfect dress for special occassions , perfect house , perfect wedding , perfect friends . But the irony of life is we are not clear about the concept of perfection .

Can we lead a 100% perfect life ? A life without failure or sorrow or tears ?

Life is not a linear journey . It has ups and downs , highs and lows
. Striving for the best is really nice but we need to be prepared for failure . There will be times when even the best strategies won’t work . When all the hard work and effort won’t produce the expected result then what ? Should we stop living ? Should we stop dreaming ?
No the answer is persistance . If we try to avoid failure we will never be able to face them .We will spend the rest of our lives blaming ourself for being imperfect . We need to accept the fact that there will be times when we wont achieve what we plan for in our first attempt or may be what we are trying to achieve is not in our own favor .

Don’t run after the illusion of perfect life . Imperfection is the real perfection . Accept the mistakes , failures and learn from them if  we ignore this lesson it will only make our lives miserable .

Even the moon has scars ,
Even the best teachers don’t know it all ,
We succeed , we fall ,
No one has ever achieved perfection so far,
Imperfection is the real perfection for us all .